Instrument addiction and Nas concert.

If I fail my Exam, I’ll tell your pimp to fire you. Anna Goldstienberg.

So recently I’ve been taking my bell (think hotel service bell) around with me in public. It pretty much instantly attracts attention (mostly confused, amused and positive) and starts conversations. It’s like that time I wore a party hat in public and interesting people talked to me randomly and I got free ice-cream.

I’ve recently been looking up various instruments that I can also add to my arsenal for personal use. So far i’ve bought an airhorn, and considering a whistle (sold by a non profit charity, also the design is pretty rad). I bought a friend a old school bell town criers used to use. Shit, that would have been awesome, oh well.

Instrument-wise, i’ve been quite harsh on my selection of possible instruments to use in my current instrument addiction phase. I’m considering get a trumpet (mainly to make fun of Timmy Trumpet), mini piano, loudspeaker, a cowbell and an accordion (i’d rather not spend over $100 for a joke).

So far i’ve rejected the following ideas:
tambourine (I’m not a hippie)
Bagpipes (This would just be annoying and an inconvenience to carry and learn to play, not that it requires any skill to play or anything…)
Claves (I’m not a monk)
Kazoo (Yeah.. No)
Maracas (I actually own a pair, though it is very ‘boy from oz’)
Bongos (you can only create like 5 beats on a congo and they all sound average)

Segue
Yesterday I went to the Nas concert with Q*bert and Supernatural. I prepared for Supernatural by trying to find random objects that would throw him off guard. Fruit or vegetables… meh, meat… hmm possibility, powdered soup mix… hmmm very random, No Salt (alternative low sodium salt substitute).. Bingo. The chick at the counter fucked up the sale and put the item through as bird food, nicely done, you can’t even type a few numbers on a register and realize that ‘No salt’ isn’t bird food. Enjoy your failed life. Technically since the price (and Item) was wrongly scanned I should have got the item for free, meh. I took $100 cash out, told her she fucked up the scan and she ignored me, nice, I saw it as an atm fee and left.

Went to a friends place, watched them make pizza, got several messages from another group of friends to hurry up and come to their place, left, ran to the concert, they still weren’t there, ran into several more friends, they finally came, Q-bert came on, Supernatural came on and this:
He freestyled and rapped for a while, Cool, But as he was about to finish, He told everyone to dig into their pockets and that he would freestyle about anything he grabs. He sees my ‘no salt’ and confetti and says “this guy came prepared”. Q*bert drops a beat and Supernat grabs by items. He freestyled an awesome verse about confetti that I can’t remember at all and then swung the box and confetti went everywhere. The crowd went wild. The he started to freestyle about my ‘No Salt’. Amazingly he freestyled a really witty verse about “no sodium for this guy” or something and threw it back to me. Crowd went wild.

He moved on and did a few more awesome verses, then I remembered I had my bell in my pocket. He grabbed it and said “…I never stop rocking til I hit that bell”
*ding*. Crowd went wild. I asked the security guy to give my bell back and he was being a capital dick and wouldn’t return it. I looked through my phone and found a photo I took of it a while back and showed it to him, he reluctantly gave it back.

Nas came on next, He was pretty awesome.
(I’m assuming that was the shortest review for a headline act ever)

Actually:
There was this woman right? and throughout Nas, she kept extending her arm and yelled Nas. This would seem normal right? but in her fingers was a friendship bracelet. I’m …pretty sure Nas has been offered just about everything, from sex, drugs, drinks, etc, But this woman thinks that Nas will go down and get this looped yarn from her. Ridiculous.

Met Sampology and Charlie Hustle after the show and they found my items amusing and took a photo, then I got a picture with Supernatural after the show, holding onto my no salt, confetti and bell.

The kids I were with decided to go to the valley, I had shorts on, but reluctantly went, on the way I threw confetti and made a trail of ‘no salt’ and even gave it a taste. ‘No salt’, No thanks. I’d take high sodium content salt anyday.

They wanted to go to Alhumbra, the security guard wouldn’t let me in, I was tired anyway but thought I might as well try to talk my way in just for the hell of it. I said the guy in front of me had shorts on, the guard goes “oh shit” and tells him that he can’t come it. I say “ooh… shit. I didn’t mean it..”, the guy had an European accent and was confused and upset that we was getting kicked out. I said to the bouncer that it was he’s last day in Australia and that he has cancer. I don’t think he heard me becuase he still wouldn’t let him in. Later the door chick let both of us in. I let her touch my bell-end.

Inside was pretty boring to be honest. I left everyone as they went to a different club. Apperantly they went to Gloria Jeans after I left, how gangster, Cafe after a Hip Hop show…

On the way home I met some people I knew that went to the concert.

The end.